The Cellar Dweller in Search of Enlightenment

The Cellar Dweller in Search of Enlightenment


Bu in Chinese can be translated to English in form of the word "stance". There are varied forms of this exercise and each has a specific energetic (Chi)  signature and trains the body in unique ways. Horse stance ( Ma Bu) , Golden Rooster on one leg (Jin Ji Du Li), Bow stance (Gong Bu) are but a few of the ones I practiced daily in my dank, often roach filled, cold, musty cement walled project basement "bedroom".

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Sexual Abuse and Replayed Energy


So here we are,

watching history unfold and repeat and the past invisible cords of energy to replay the same old shit over and over.

As of late, sexual perversion has come into play in human consciousness and years of hidden bullshit is finally surfacing and being exposed. Now as my wife is a survivor of a rape in her youth, I know 1st hand of the emotional toil that such a horrific event has on a person.

So I revel in the fact that women ( and men) are beginning to open the floodgates on all the stored energy and years of isolation and pain as result of past sexual abuse. The crossroads however that we are at, the point where this whole metaphysical energy things is a sneaky son a bitch ( like the perverts) that people cannot now "gang up" and then become "us against them" ( women vs men, men vs men, men vs women, women vs women, etc)....if this happens, negative energy will have a chance to jump from the perverts, transmute and attach to a new host(s) and then become part of a mob based rage one that keeps people from actually moving ahead.

This energy shit is VERY complex and to be honest a lot of it was recently brought up to me at my home while a script of my life was being rewritten ( for the zillionth time). The person involved in writing it with me was going off topic and told me of many of the abuses that were going on in the "hidden" Hollywood, she told me lots of weird shit.

I told her that she should remain focused on the details of my life story/ movie, but , well energy took its course ( as it always does) and we wound up talking about the energy of rape, etc...for 2 days. At the end of the time we had together, I said "Well, looks like that ( sexual abuse) will be the energy that currently needs to be shifted" ( FYI: This meeting occurred was last spring).

Did the script rewrite ever get finished? Nope.

The energy that needed to be dumped in my lap came into my field and well, then it was in my lap to shift or to leave alone. Since my wife was a survivor, it was time to say fuck you to all the assholes who abused power and did my metaphysical thing in the middle of the night for weeks on end after the script meeting was done.

People need to now not let deeds of the past trigger rage, rather trigger enlightenment within so that the vibration can be raised ABOVE the energies of the past and not allow it to once again slither into some new form and manifest somewhere else, in some other manor.

This is the secret to reality itself......Quantum Entanglement....don't store energy of rage within as it will still have a chance to manifest somewhere else ( we are all one). 

Release it.......this is a wonderful Crossroad to be at , a wonderful chance for REAL movement for ALL...the bullshit energy of abuse can be flushed. We are all in this together, what we are experiencing currently is a chance, don't give into hate, rage, attack energy..that is what caused pain for so many, create love for survivors, support for survivors, and the forgiveness vibration.



Brian Collins -The Rabid Monk



©2017 Brian Collins


Bald for spiritual reasons.......

Bald for spiritual reasons.......

....She was giving me a real mean, you are the absolute filth of the earth look. I couldn't figure it out till she passed and saw a "tree huggy esq logo" on her t shirt ( think Subaru type hippy design). Then it hit me....My head is shaved!!!  she thought I was one of those alt right clowns! To which I said to myself "This is the reason the world is the way it is,  holy sheep shit! I am screaming into a void!'.

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Flat butt

Is a spiritual teacher a superhero? No.

Well hello all, it has been a bit since I have the chance to write something....why?
Well if you saw  the position I am writing in currently you would laugh as I cant sit, so I am kneeling ( ala proposal) on one knee typing. 

Why am I asking for the hand of my computer in marriage?

Well, because I fell off a rock about a month ago moving out of the way for a disabled person climbing along the rocks of a gorge I was in..I landed hard and busted up my back. You see my old Martial Arts training kicked in and I landed the way I should....except that fact that my body is not the body of my 22 year old super fast spinning crescent kick throwing self.....

How did my lovely wife of 24 years explain it....??

She said..." Well you have an old Irish butt ( no ass), so there is no longer a muscle to absorb the shock like you did when you were in your 20's, so the hard the landing went right into your back".... So I have been rehabbing my flat Irish pancake ass daily and slowly getting back to normal....the funny thing? The accident happened right near a creepy section of the gorge called "Devils Den"....yup, can't make this shit up.  

Anyway hopefully I will be back to my sarcastic ways asap.....the lesson for all? Dont discount the fact that a spiritual teacher is human, NEVER place a spiritual teacher above you...I am human just like you, I just have some unique abilities.

Any spiritual teacher that states it differently, well, then they are an asshole.

Also, if you look at say "Well if he was so spiritual, then that shouldn't have happened"....How about this? It happened because I was spiritual, because I was in fact doing something good at the time , something tried to stop me from doing something good ie: creating some good energy.- Not that the fucking world needs good energy right now, right?

But this isnt the 1st time at this I have been dealing /fighting evil for a long , long time.


-and I am still here.


The Rabid ( Flat assed)  Monk

S&S Deli

Hi All,

Long time no blog.

I have been sick with a buck nasty flu that has moved into my body and refuses to move out.  

I am about 85% better and thank goodness that it is not now in my throat/chest right now...( which it is) because here the Massachusetts we are being invaded by gypsy moths.

If you don't know these creepy crawlies...that are the assholes of the insect world. This year is very bad around my area and my home is covered with trees that seem to be very tasty for them. The sound of them munching on leaves is absolutely nightmarish. ...yeeeeesh.

Guess what?

What goes in must come out! yup all over the place is little gypsy moth poo....everywhere! in the state parks, along walks...horrible. The hairs of these little bastards are also troublesome and cause rashes.. I walked up my driveway to get the mail the other day and just broke out all over....( that on top of my chest flu, made me wheeze and cough one day for 3 hours straight)....

Anyway, just before I was flattened by this flu my wife and I had a chance to go to my favorite place in Cambridge..The S&S Deli.

How about that for a transition?

I have been going to this place since I have been 15 years old.

Now if you dont know how old I am, I will say that when I was 15, Blondie had just released Parallel Lines ALBUM ....( you do the math). The S&S was the place to go to after a day of Harvard Sq record shopping, punk rock girl watching and occasional punk rock slam dance fest in the Harvard Sq. church on Sundays. I remember having 15 dollars in my pocket one day as kid and thinking "wow, this place is expensive" funny ( I think I bought a bum of friend I knew as a kid lunch with my money, what dope I was) when you are a kid who is isolated from the world.

Now the Zen of the S&S?

Well as I sat with my wife of 24 years, I reflected back on all booths I sat in, all the relationships that have passed, all the friends long since gone. Yet, here was the good ol' S&S still here, still giving me my Nova Lox with Onions Omelette..year after year, always consistent, always great. This time was quite "special" for me as when I entered however, I saw a reflection in the window as I opened the door...

The image of an old man.

The old man?


Long gone was the punk rock kid with spiky dyed blonde hair & skateboard, long gone was the long haired 20 something 80's metalhead with combat boots, ripped jeans and dress coats, long gone was the 30 something, introspective new age listening metaphysical seeker in comfy shoes and khakis.

Upon entering, I caught a glimpse of a older, shaved head man, with a bald spot forming...(still sexy mind you, just balding). This is the 1st time that I was actually in the S&S in my life, as I was hit with all the memories I had experienced in the diner, but not fully present in any of them visit during the past 37 years of going there.

I thought back on the whirlwind of my life, all the global travel, all the cosmic journeys ( good and bad) and saw my life very differently.

I was the now the Martial Arts Master that I sought out as a child.

I was the now metaphysical teacher that had the secrets of the universe that I desired to find when I was 30.

I was now friends with movie stars and famous musicians

I looked up at the window facing Cambridge street and saw my reflection as well as the reflection of my wife, my love and best friend....25 of those years she had been going there with me as well....she had gotten older ( though she still looks the same, I look like I was hit with an old stick) with me and time had ticked by.

I was a bit emotional as we have had some tough times the last couple of years ( my wife was treated for breast cancer last year and we had major changes by closing our Back Bay business of 20 years as a result of her being ill).....but this isnt a boo hoo blog post. I saw how solid she was, how she was my rock, my world....I guess I like Buddha , just woke up that day....he did it under a tree, I did it in booth drinking coffee.

So, what did I order?

Yup My Nova Omelette and was it good?

Of course it was, I was in the S&S Deli in was good that more memory formed.


The Rabid Monk


I was NOT paid in anyway by the S&S Deli to write this blog post.